Sermon Notes
Pastor Jeff Stanfill

Wisdom
Making Your Home a Treasure House - Family Series
April 23, 2006

MAKING YOUR HOME A TREASURE HOUSE
(COMMUNICABLE ATTRIBUTES OF GOD)
WISDOM
TEXT: PROV. 21:20
INTRO:
LEGOES.

ILLU: God is wise in joining Mary Ann and me.

ILLU: Is God wise? To say God is wise is simple enough. It seems silly to think any other way. But I find that often I question whether God really knows what He is doing. This week I learned that a special young couple miscarried a baby at three months. This is such a loving couple and I wonder why them.

I DIVINE WISDOM.
We must be reminded that God is wise. Rom 16:27 to the only wise God be glory forever through Jesus Christ! Amen.
Job 9:4 His wisdom is profound, his power is vast.
Who has resisted him and come out unscathed?
Ps 104:24. How many are your works, O LORD!
In wisdom you made them all; the earth is full of your creatures.

God's wisdom is shown in creation as even when marred by sin, it functions in a way that amazes us the more we learn.

Job who had grounds to question events in life, says that God's wisdom is profound.

Even salvation is the wisest plan of rescuing humans from this fallen world and sin. 1 Cor 1:20-25. For since in the wisdom of God the world through its wisdom did not know him, God was pleased through the foolishness of what was preached to save those who believe. 22 Jews demand miraculous signs and Greeks look for wisdom, 23 but we preach Christ crucified: a stumbling block to Jews and foolishness to Gentiles, 24 but to those whom God has called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God and the wisdom of God. 25 For the foolishness of God is wiser than man's wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than man's strength.

God is bringing together a group of people from every generation, race, and language to unity them into one group in Jesus Christ. No one as ever been able to do something like that.

God is wise but what do we mean when we say that? We mean that "God always chooses the best goals and the best way to those goals." (Grudem). While I may have questions about what is going on, discouragement hounds me, I lack a big picture with details - as His child I can rest knowing that He is working wisely to bring me to Christlikeness.

What does this mean for relationships and family?
II. FAMILY WISDOM
1. Wisdom applies the right knowledge at the right time. Timing is crucial to treasured relationships. I have been entertained by a TV commercial (what it entices me to buy I do not remember!) about a man on a date. His timing is horribly off as she begins to talk deeply about their relationship and where it is going. She asks a question and he just looks at her with this goofy smile. She asks another question and he continues to smile. Then at her third question he gives an answer to the first which is NOT the right answer to the third question. Not sure what they are selling but timing is important to treasure a relationship.

In the area of dating and courtship there are some actions and words that are good but only in their time. Obviously, never say 'I love you' until you do. Physical, sexually intimacy is good but only in its right time which is after the marriage altar and never before. At the wrong time it will destroy the future of the relationship instead of help cement it together. Financial resources and responsibilities should not be shared until after marriage. The fact you know someone that had no problems doing so only means they were fortunate and the exception.

As parents Mary Ann and I have followed a four stage paradigm which relies on wisdom - the right thing at the right time.
· First, a parent is a disciplinarian. This stage is from birth through the beginning years of formal school or elementary years. The goal of this stage is that one's child becomes voice trained. At the sound of your voice they respond. They must learn that "no" means "no". This involves spanking at times until they catch on that at the sound of your voice they obey.
· The second stage is trainer. This stage is from just after early elementary through junior high, you are training your child. If you have successfully disciplined your son in that stage, the training will be more productive as easier. Here they learn what to do. They learn responsibility (give them daily chores); courtesy (respect for others and authority); living skills like hygiene and cleanliness, housekeeping, how to make a bed, wash the dishes, maybe cook a meal.
· As a parent is successful as a disciplinarian and a trainer, they enter the stage of being a coach. This is from the teen years until adulthood. Parents, we can send in the play, but they have to run it. And sometimes instead of running the play they ruin the play. And our job is to provide the coaching to keep them in the game. You can do it for them in this stage. They have to do it themselves.
· Then after those coaching years, a parent can become a respected adult friend. Someone the children want to include in their lives, have fun with, talk things out with, ask advice from, and even give advise to!
But here is what happens too often. A parent unwisely applies the wrong role at the wrong time. A three year old cannot be coached. If you are 12 years old, you should know be past the need for a spanking. One of the most common lacks of wisdom is that of trying to be a friend with one's child before they reach full maturity. Mom, your daughter does not need and doubtfully wants you to be a best friend when she is 16. She does not want you dressing like her, talking like her, and hanging out with other teenage girls. You can do that with her when she comes into maturity.

2. A home and a relationship that is a treasure house wisely know that the root of every problem is depravity and discipleship. Therefore, it knows that the answer to every problem is regeneration and conversion. You can train a child to use the best manners and speak with the utmost respect. But who is that child on the inside where no one sees? From the experience of my own life as a son, a brother, a husband, a father, and a friend I know beyond all doubt that the root cause of every relationship problem is selfishness born from sinfulness. When division occurs in a relationship it is due to one or both parties lack of living Christ like or discipleship. Jesus called us to come die. We want to come to Jesus and eat pie! Releasing our "personal rights" to live pleasing to God, resolves conflicts. James 4:1-3 What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don't they come from your desires that battle within you? 2 You want something but don't get it. You kill and covet, but you cannot have what you want. You quarrel and fight. You do not have, because you do not ask God. 3 When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures.

Two observations; one, we live for ourselves "that you may spend what you get on your pleasures." And, two, we expect others to satisfy us and only God is able to do that, "You do not have because you do not ask God." I suspect that we avoid asking God because we know that He is wise enough not to give us what we want! The principle is as we sing it, "You can satisfy my soul like You."

We expect trinkets and trivia to fill God shaped and God sized treasure chests. And nothing will except Him and what He provides in His wisdom. We are disappointed with our spouses because we are not happy. Nowhere in the Bible is a husband or a wife commanded to make the other happy. God makes us happy! We look to work and recognition of that work to gives us contentment. And the Bible is clear that it is in Jesus Christ that we know contentment.

ILLU: Know why the foods bad for you taste so good and the foods good for you taste so bad? God is speaking to us in that! He is showing us that we are born with a natural taste for the world or that way of living which does not honor God. It tastes so good and seems so satisfying until at age 45 we have a heart attack or diabetes at 30. We have to acquire a taste for the good foods. We learn the enjoyment of their flavor. We gain a taste for the healthful things until we truly prefer them over the bad things. And so we must acquire a taste for God. Because in eternity, it will show the difference!

3. This wisdom comes out of the Bible. Ps 19:7. The law of the LORD is perfect, reviving the soul. The statutes of the LORD are trustworthy, making wise the simple. NIV Deut 4:6-8 Observe them carefully, for this will show your wisdom and understanding to the nations, who will hear about all these decrees and say, "Surely this great nation is a wise and understanding people." 7 What other nation is so great as to have their gods near them the way the LORD our God is near us whenever we pray to him? 8 And what other nation is so great as to have such righteous decrees and laws as this body of laws I am setting before you today? Wise people and wise families will, among other things, use Scripture when discipling children, be in church and Bible study, pray Scriptures together, avoid self-promoting wisdom James 3:13-16. Who is wise and understanding among you? Let him show it by his good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom. 14 But if you harbor bitter envy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast about it or deny the truth. 15 Such "wisdom" does not come down from heaven but is earthly, unspiritual, of the devil. 16 For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice. Some people are very clever in manipulating to get their way (and the world calls it wisdom); but is it God's way and what He wants?

4. The wise family and relationship knows that wisdom begins with the fear of the Lord. This is the first principle of wisdom - a man should humble himself before God in reverence and worship. Wisdom understands the facts and their significance, knowing what then to do. When the facts are understood (He is God and we are not), their significance becomes clear (we submit to God). That is the first sign of someone becoming wise.

CONCL:
Are you set on the best goals? How wise are you? Do you see God for who He is? Do you understand the significance of God? If so, you are on your way to living in a home that is a treasure house.

Encourage you:
1. God is wisely at work in your life. His best goal ( your Christlikeness) is be accomplished in the best way! Whatever situation you are experiencing, whether it is pleasant or painful - you can trust this, Rom 8:28-30. And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. 29 For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the likeness of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. 30 And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified.
2. We can ask God for wisdom. James 1:5. If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.
3. When all of God's wisdom is not given to us - when we don't understand why - we can trust Him. He will give us what we need while we endure. 1 Peter 4:19. So then, those who suffer according to God's will should commit themselves to their faithful Creator and continue to do good.